It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize