So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
