if only i could text you this smell
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
