...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
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