so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
