it was like his penis was on wheels.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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