dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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