I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize
