Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
