just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
