obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
