He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
