My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize