so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me