Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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