We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
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