yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Randomize
