He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
