it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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