The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
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I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
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I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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