I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
