marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
