Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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