Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.

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(678): View more from Georgia

So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions

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(407): View more from Florida

i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(315): View more from New York

apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week

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(714): View more from California

The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you

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(204): View more from Manitoba

I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast

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