my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
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I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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