I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
