your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
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