I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize