She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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