Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
