"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
