I wanna bring you to show and tell
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize