I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Randomize
