i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
