my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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