Dual....:-)
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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