I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
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