My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
