Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
You ruined the universe
Randomize
