I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
