Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
her vagine was all disorganized.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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