Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
