he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home