its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
