So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize