if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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