its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
