There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
