She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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