There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
