Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
