But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Randomize
